No...I was not cursing...MTHFR is the acronym for methylenetetrahydrofolate reductase. It is a genetic mutation that can cause numerous problems depending on which mutation you have. After seeing my naturopath to help get my hormones back in order after the second miscarriage, she suggested I have the testing done to see if I carry the gene that is linked to recurrent miscarriages (among other things such as heart disease, strokes, clotting...the list seems endless!). Basically, my body doesn't break down folic acid appropriately, which leads to the build up of homocysteine which is what causes all the dysfunction. Not just in my body, but can also cause neural tube defects in the growing baby. If we can bypass the folic acid and break it down FOR my body, we should be able to skip around the dysfunction and bring my body back into some sort of balance, and protect further pregnancies.
Lo and behold...I was positive for the mutation most linked to recurrent miscarriage, and likely what caused the massive subchorionic hemorrhage in the last pregnancy. I was relieved and scared at the same time. Relieved that we had a cause and it wasn't just a "fluke", and scared because I began to wonder if we would ever be able to have more kids again. Having 2 back to back miscarriages had begun to cloud my mind with questions and fears and unknowns.
I am a nerd at heart, and I secretly (or maybe not so secretly) really enjoy the research side of things, so I started researching this supplement and how it was supposed to benefit me. I'd read countless stories of people going from depressed and anxious to feeling "normal" for the first time in their entire life. It turns out, folate when broken down appropriately during the methylation process, is responsible for organizing your neurotransmitters-mainly serotonin and dopamine Who knew?! I however, did not have such pleasant side effects. I got a massive headache, followed by intense anxiety and irritability after just a few days. I stopped the L methylfolate, and started doing some more digging. This is supposed to be good for me, and clearly, based on testing, I need it...right? So, why do I feel like crap???
I emailed my naturopath, who advised me to cut way back on the supplement to see if that would help. Folate is technically a B vitamin, and can be stimulating to some people (me!). Ugh. Ok, so I cut way back and still felt foggy, irritable, anxious, and unable to sleep. I cut it out completely for a few days and started researching again. Apparently, long term use of high doses of B12 and other B vitamins, can cause a potassium deficiency. I have been taking large doses of B 12 for over a year due to the pyroluria and subsequent B deficiency. When one starts mehtylfolate, it drastically increases the demand for potassium within the cells causing hypokalemia (low potassium) and about a million different possible side effects. Since I had informed my naturopath that I was still feeling yucky, and had not heard back, I decided to get a potassium supplement and just hope for the best. I started taking it and then started taking the l methylfolate- no side effects! Yay! So...I am hoping to steadily increase the dosage of the methylfolate to what I'm actually supposed to be taking.
I'll be honest- I did not come at this whole process with a great attitude. I've been in such a rush to heal and move on that every little upset to that plan has tipped me over...not a great place to be. I've been frustrated that it's taking so long to heal. I've been angry that my body wasn't responding too well to the supplement, and that is ONE MORE DELAY to adding to our family. I've just been frustrated- even a bit hopeless at times. But, once I sat back and just accepted that this is where we are at, that it's taking longer than I would like, I've been a much easier person to be around. I've realized that in my rush to move forward, I haven't been enjoying the day to day- and that's not really ok with me. There is so much good in every day. So much to be grateful for, that we often miss out on it when we are so focused on all the is NOT working. Well, there's a lot that IS Working, and I think that deserves more of my focus and attention.
I have no idea what the future holds...and I've learned to just take things one day at a time. Trusting in God's perfect love and Father-ship- that he will be completely faithful to bring us to a place of abudance. Not lack.
